Having sex is a natural and important part of the relationship of each magnet pair. Most take for granted and could not imagine being robbed of this simple pleasure.
Unfortunately, this is exactly what happens to many people who are living with cancer or recovery from illness. It can be extremely painful for them and their families.
There was certainly upsetting for my husband Brian and me. We had been together for more than 30 years old when he was diagnosed with pleural mesothelioma. We had a very loving relationship, good sex was a part of it.
Shortly after his diagnosis, doctors prescribed morphine to control the pain he felt. The powerful drug controlled his pain, but unfortunately he also lowered his libido, and we were more able to enjoy sex we had in the past.
Medication against pain affected Our Intimacy
We both felt robbed. It seemed ironic to us that this comes at a sensitive time in our lives. With so little time left together, we wanted and needed to be as close to each other as possible.
Realizing that its drug against pain was the cause of this problem, Brian considered not to take some days. I persuaded him not to do it for a good reason: Despite the absence of our sexual intimacy, keeping Brian out of pain was my priority
I had found information on the Web on the control chronic pain associated with mesothelioma .. it helped me understand how important it was for Brian to continue taking his medication daily pain and regularly, as prescribed by his doctor.
Fortunately, Brian and I never had trouble communicating. We openly discussed how our inability to have sexual intercourse affected us, and we were able to find other ways to express our love for each other.
physical and psychological conditions affecting sex
The inability to experience sexual satisfaction, known as sexual dysfunction is a complex issue and can be caused by physical and psychological conditions including:
- cancer treatment: the side effects of chemotherapy, including nausea, fatigue and a change in bowel habits can affect sexual desire of men and women. the chemotherapy can also cause vaginal dryness in women, making intercourse painful. Radiation therapy has similar side effects to chemotherapy and can affect men and women equally. Depending on the type of cancer and given radiation treatment, more serious side effects can occur. For example, radiation can change the lining in the uterus, making intercourse painful. Men who receive radiation in the genital area may have difficulty achieving or maintaining an erection
- Sadness :. It is not uncommon to experience feelings of sadness when dealing with a cancer diagnosis. Sadness can sometimes lead to depression, which can focus on anything else, including sex, almost impossible
- Body Image :. Cancer treatments, such as surgery, chemotherapy and radiation therapy, can cause visible change at the body of a person. Mastectomies leave behind physical and mental scars that may make some women feel unattractive or less feminine. It can also cause the anxiety of being naked in front of their partner
- Loss of sensation: .. Some treatments against cancer can desensitize the sexual organs
- Loss of Libido: drugs strong as morphine, commonly used to treat cancer pain, can reduce sexual desire
- Anxiety :. Embarrassment to the inability to maintain an erection because of the side effects of treatment, the scars of the body or the fear of getting sick can cause men and women to stop sexual activity.
Whatever the reasons, the inability to have sex can be very upsetting for a couple of lovers. Although they may not realize, sex is not the only thing they lack. There also is no physical contact with their partner, and the wonderful feeling of being touched in a loving way.
When a couple holding hands or cuddling, it is their way of expressing, "I care about you. I want to be with you. I love you. "This much needed intimacy is often better than the sex act itself.
There is no reason why couples should stop kissing, cuddling and caressing when sex is possible, but unfortunately, this is often the case. This unfortunate situation may cause no privacy at all, and the couple may feel alienated at a time when they need each other most.
Tips for wives and husbands of cancer patients
It is important to understand that the cancer has not changed that your loved one is. However, the cancer experience has changed their bodies and sometimes their ability to physically express in a way that both of you are accustomed.
The reluctance of your partner to have sex does not necessarily mean they do not love you. It is common for people to lose interest in sex when they are facing or recovering from cancer. Remember, your loved one is vulnerable and needs your love and comfort than ever.
Be patient and loving at all times. Hopefully their desire for intimacy will return
Here are some ways you can help your loved :.
- Communication: Communication is the key to a happy relationship. Talk to your loved honestly about your feelings. Asked why they are reluctant to make love. It may surprise you
- Help Offer :. Ask if there is something you can do to feel better. Be prepared to back up your words with action
- Reinsurance: .. Let your partner know that you find attractive, regardless scars or missing parts of the body, is vital and necessary for their physical and mental healing
- Romance: Make your beloved feel special, like you did before their diagnosis. Offer them chocolates, flowers or an intimate dinner for two
- Human Touch Power. Human touch is vital to the welfare of all. He was credited with the heart rate slows down, which lowers blood pressure and strengthening the immune system - it feels as good
- Making Love Without Sex: Making love is to let someone know how much you love and do not always need to involve sex. Touch your partner with love whenever you have the chance. It will bring great relief and happiness to you both. When the need for sexual liberation occurs, it is possible to get without penetration. Be honest with each other about your needs. Kiss, hug and caress as you did in the past, and let nature take its course.
