I lost my father when I was 14. This was a hard pill to swallow. To say that I supported his battle with mesothelioma with him would be an understatement.
My whole family has endured his illness. We were immersed in taking care of him, struggling to come to terms with reality.
I remember the nights I retreat to my room and lock the door. I will turn my stereo to muffle the sound of my tears. It was hard. There were times when I really thought it was more than I could bear.
The days pass, if you want or not.
Take time to reflect
This year marks 22 years since my dad passed. Things have changed so much for me. I am a woman and a mother, and I graduate with my second degree in March.
My eyes fill with tears and my heart swells with pride that I think of how my father would feel if he could see me now.
I wish things had been different. I wish it ?? D has never worked in his life away at a paper mill. I wish it ?? d never been ill with mesothelioma. I think of all the things I would have done differently if given the chance. His illness has become a part of me in my adult life.
I even cast my career differently because of his illness. When I was a little girl, I used to tell my father when I was growing up, I ?? would become a journalist, Tom Selleck marry and have five boys. Wow, I was away.
I still love to write, but I do it more for fun than financial gain. I n ?? t marry Tom Selleck, but I did marry a horse wrangler southeastern Kentucky. I have five beautiful children, two girls and a boy and two girls biologically I ?? ve been blessed with marriage.
Finding My Calling
Instead of journalism, I chose psychology. My fight ?? s father with mesothelioma led me to a desire to advise people with serious diseases such as mesothelioma and their families.
There wasn ?? t until the end of my 20s, I really came to grips with losing my father. I'm sure I could have received counseling through the mourning period, although I didn t ?? recognize the need until I started studying psychology. The time and education have opened the eyes of many difficult realities caused by asbestos.
I now realize my true calling in life is to tell people about my experiences and the dangers of exposure to asbestos.
struggles my family endured similar struggles families face today. While medical advances have changed the outlook for many patients, many factors remain the same.
Speaking Out for Change
The paper mill where my father worked was demolished shortly after his death. I wish I could say that the city has torn down because many men have been diagnosed with mesothelioma. Unfortunately, it wasn ?? t the case.
The paper mill was demolished in the name of progress. The company has decided to return the tail and run rather than face the families left due to recklessness and deceit.
My father would be a relief to know the company sigh no longer publishes gloves made from asbestos in its unknowing employees.
Today, it is still legal in the United States the use of asbestos. People continue to be exposed to the deadly mineral in the workplace, at school and even in their homes.
I hope in my lifetime we will see a law that protects the families of asbestos. I hope we see tremendous medical breakthroughs that lead to a cure for all cancers, including mesothelioma. I hope somehow my contribution to the world makes the fight someone else ?? with a little less bitter mesothelioma.
As the daughter of my father ?? s, I think it is my duty to speak. I won ?? t leave me silent grief.
Perhaps someone needs to hear what I have to say. Maybe they just need to know there are others going through the same struggles and facing the same fears. I think my father would have wanted me to plead on his behalf.
Celebrating Father
Each fall used to bring sadness and struggle of pain in the forefront of my mind. I still have my days, but most of the time I'm done crying. Rather than the cry of woe is me ?? I found something more constructive to do with my time.
I choose to celebrate the life of my ?? s father rather than mourn his death. I make it my business to ensure my grandchildren ?? s father know. Through photos and my memories, my children have a fairly accurate picture of the man, they could not meet.
I can not imagine a man ever be a better father than my father. If I can save one person from excessive grief, everything will be worth it. I feel I have the greatest dad ?? s the world as much.
