Thinking about the inevitability of our own death is not something we like to do, however, death is a fact of life. We must all accept that our life will end one day.
With no way of knowing how or when it will happen, it's easy to push the dead in the back of our minds. This is why many people do not get there to make a will.
Unfortunately, dying without a will can have serious consequences for the relatives left behind.
This week, author Me on Lean Lorraine Kember team and I to share our experiences and explain the preparation of a will really mean yourself and your loved ones peace of mind of giving.
Deciding to prepare a will
When Lorraine's husband, Brian, was diagnosed with mesothelioma, Professor Bruce Robinson was told to hope for the best ?? and prepare for the worst. It was sound advice, and is exactly what Brian has done
This is what Lorraine has to say about his experience :.
"Although Brian and I both wrote wills many years before Brian was diagnosed with mesothelioma, they must be updated. After we witnessed this, we filed them away, and do not think about them.
I will always be grateful that Brian had a will when he died. I was asked to present this as an opportunity where to put my affairs in order.
notice her given by Professor Robinson, regarding the preparation for the worst, should not be heard by those who are elderly or suffering from an incurable disease.
life comes with no guarantees. We all need to prepare for the worst, and write a will. This is the only way to ensure that our relatives will receive the gifts that we wish for them to have to our death. "
Dangers of not preparing a will
My mother, Lena, has decided to prepare her will after being diagnosed with cancer may be caused by exposure to asbestos. When Lena died the following year, she enjoyed the peace of mind to have his will in order.
Losing my mother was extremely difficult, but knowing she had documented her wishes made things easier for me and my father. I'm glad we could spend our last few weeks to be with her, and make her comfortable, rather than rush to settle his affairs.
In fact, I would say that the loss of peace of mind is the greatest danger of not having a will. This is because I have seen the alternative. People who wait until death is eminent for preparing suffer extreme distress. Families panic when they realize they do not know the wishes of their loved ones.
Meanwhile, their beloved is losing or has already lost the ability to communicate these wishes. And if a person has lost their mental capacity, it is too late to make a will. There is no valid will without ability.
If someone dies without a valid will, the court distributes their property in accordance with state law. These laws, known as the laws of intestacy, the priority list in which the property is distributed after death. State laws also list the priority to choose the person who will administer someone's estate.
But the deceased may have had different priorities. If you want to leave some assets to certain individuals, known as a bequest, you're better off making a will in advance. In all wills that I've seen, I've never met anyone who wants exactly adapted to the laws of intestacy.
Do not wait to address end of life issues
Lorraine advises people not to wait. She says "once this has been taken care of, you can put it in a safe place, forget, and to return to the enjoyment of life."
I would add that, once it is written, you should consider reviewing periodically. That's what Lorraine and her husband have to see if it needed updating.
For those concerned about the costs of preparing a will, you may be surprised by the availability of free options and low cost.
In my career, I have volunteered to help people prepare wills and other end of life documents. I did it through free legal clinics sponsored by churches, associations of lawyers and organizations like AARP. In addition to these options, you might ask patients the service departments at hospitals or other medical providers for a list of possible resources for free or low-cost legal help.
My mother was herself preparing to medical expenses that accompany a diagnosis of cancer. So it would not necessarily spend money on a will, but he knew it was important to have. As I knew she probably wanted me to be a beneficiary, I told him it was not ethical for me to prepare his will. (I also was not allowed in his state.)
Instead, I tested a popular brand of will preparation software for it. He seemed to ask the appropriate questions to his situation. So I sat with her, as she did, and explained the legal terms she did not understand. But even if I had vetted the software in advance, I thought even missed some things she wanted. I then asked a colleague, who was allowed in his state, to help clean up the final product.
I always tell people that if they are going to use the software, at least try to see if you can get a lawyer to review the final product before running it. Depending on the complexity of your estate and the accuracy of your software, you may be able to save a little on legal fees.
My father hired a lawyer to write a will when I was a little girl. He returned to the same lawyer after my mother died to have it updated. The lawyer accused a low price. I think the ideal situation: invest a little in front, then a family lawyer, you can come back when your living conditions inevitably change
I put also caution people that if the will are the most well-known legal. instruments to document his last wishes, they are not necessarily the only document you will need. Not all of your goods can be transmitted through a will. life insurance, property held in trusts, bank accounts payable on death and retirement plans are some examples.
It is also a good idea to prepare a separate document with your wishes for funeral arrangements.
you can certainly include these things in a will if you want, but the problem is that the wills are generally not read until a few days or weeks after the death. It's good for close to have something on hand to guide decisions on memorial services, funerals and burials.
I squeezed the list of my mother during the days between his death and his funeral. His will has never been out of reach during the months when I administered his estate. It was like she was there, holding my hand, guiding me along the way to ensure that everything was done the desired path.
If you have not written a will yet, why not write one now? Consider making arrangements today to give your loved ones the gift even Brian and Lena have Lorraine and Karen.
