When we ?? re going through a difficult period as a cancer diagnosis or emotional disorder, it is not uncommon for friends and family to say ?? Let me know if I can help.??
shake our heads in general and to answer yes, but do we ever really take on it?
Many of us do not do it for our own personal reasons, but sometimes we have to reconsider the offer of help because we could not realize how it can be.
17-year-old daughter of a close friend has cerebral palsy and uses a wheelchair. She took care of her since birth.
There ?? s been a long road to this point, and a long way to go still. She ?? s shared as much as she loves her daughter, she often feels trapped. It doesn ?? t seem to be a way out of being the constant demand of a person who is completely dependent.
My world ?? s friend revolves around the needs of her daughter. Everything else comes second ?? especially his personal needs.
Caring for cancer patients is a full-time job
There ?? s similar to a person who takes care of a loved one with cancer.
Keep appointments with the doctor and treatment is like a full time job. Then there is the endless ?? bad days ?? when a loved one needs not only a physical, but also a constant emotional support to continue.
He leaves the caregiver drained, and essentially imprisoned.
My friend shared that in the early days of his self-imposed ?? containment ?? she tried to do everything herself. She was afraid of disturbing friends and family by taking their offers of help
Now, she sees things differently
Repeat After Me: .. "I accept any help
as a caregiver veteran, said she now ?? I accept all help.??
You see it ?? s learned something. When she retired for a short time, she returned with a new attitude. It is a way to manage the stress of caregivers.
She recalled how much she loves her daughter and how it can ?? t imagine life without it. Distance gives him a new perspective and refreshes his mind to another section. In fact, she has just spent three days with me in Orlando, while her husband and son assumed caregiving responsibilities to give him a break.
?? And there is something else ?? she says, ?? People really want to help. They are not simply throw their wave offering to be pleasant. Most really want to do something, but feel awkward about what they could possibly do to help alleviate a serious need. They feel inadequate.??
My friend said offers of help make her feel less alone in a difficult journey. ?? Someone cares, "she said." Someone noticed that I ?? through.??
Isn ?? t it funny how people who offer help feel that it ?? s insufficient and those who receive the offer felt it would be too much of a burden to accept?
both are wrong.
the next time a loved offer help, please, take their offer. you'll both be better for it.
