I think the pain is not something we ?? overcome, ?? but something that we learn to live with. My belief stems from my personal experience with pain and its impact on my life.
My relations with the pain started the day doctors diagnosed my husband Brian with mesothelioma. Flashes of that time remain with me to this day ?? nearly thirteen years after his death
.Fortunately, the pain did not dominate my life. My feelings of sadness are not as intense as they were after Brian, AOS death. But during those dark days, I deeply distressed and felt that part of me had died with him
In a sense, this is true. Brian, AOS death meant the death of our marriage and life that I knew and loved for 37 years. Without Brian beside me, my life was a puzzle with half the pieces missing.
Fortunately, positive thinking and writing my feelings in a journal (a habit I took while Brian disease, AOS to face my anticipatory grief) has continued to help, and I finally found the strength to move on with my life.
Looking Forward, Looking Back
I am now married to a wonderful man who lost his first wife to cancer. We share an incredible bond with our understanding of pain that we have suffered, and we are truly grateful for the second chance of love and happiness that we found in the other.
Despite the newfound happiness, Brian, AOS essence remains with me. There is no denying that after all this time I said and the life we shared still missing. Memories are hidden as gifts, waiting around every corner. I welcome them ?? even those who sadden me.
They help me recognize my loss and not repress. This is a good thing. feelings of sadness caused by memories of Brian are ephemeral. I learned long ago to focus on the memories that make me smile.
My ability to think positively assured that I was suffering from depression. Some people believe the pain and depression is the same. They are not.
The American Cancer Society says that it is common for people to be in a depressed mood when mourning the loss of a loved one. In this spirit, people can experience pain, anger, sadness and frequent crying episodes. These are all normal responses to the process of mourning, but these feelings can develop into clinical depression, a more serious problem.
One in five people in mourning will develop clinical depression, according to the American Cancer Society.
difference between grief and depression
normal pain is a natural response to loss, not a serious mental health disorder.
People who are grieving usually stay in contact with others, which periodically allows to feel pleasure. They continue to work and rebuild their lives without needing medical attention.
However, some who are grieving become depressed. They become reclusive and do not allow themselves to find pleasure in all aspects of their lives. This condition is serious, and the victims will likely need medical assistance to help them recover
Symptoms of clinical depression include :.
- devaluation of current thoughts
- Thoughts of suicide
- Inability to perform daily activities
- guilt Abstention
- Imagining things that are not there (delusions)
- extreme weight loss
the American Cancer Society recommends that all these symptoms for more than two months after the near died seek medical assistance.
Complicated Grief
While most people begin mourning a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness (early mourning) or immediately after death (death), some suppress their emotions completely. This can lead to a condition called complicated grief, or unresolved grief
complicated grief symptoms include :.
- Refusing to accept death
- Wear a conversation with the deceased as if they were still alive
- Unresolved anger
- deep depression
- family and friends Isolation
- strange behavior
Unfortunately, no one is immune to pain. The important thing to remember is that pain is a personal journey that two people will experience exactly the same way.
If you experience pain in the early death of your one or bereavement of a loved loved AOS way, remember to take care of you. Find a way to express your emotions, and if you are having trouble, don, AOT be afraid to ask for help.
